Discouragement is a funny thing. You could be walking along minding your own business, feeling excited for what’s going on and then suddenly, BANG!! It’s all changed. This was me just this last week.

I was excited to start 2020 knowing deep in my heart that it was going to be different than so many before.  My first decision was to write a list of things and places I’ve never experienced (the list hasn’t stopped by the way).  I then thought of the hashtag “#2020AdventuresoftheUnknown,” and last but not least I promised myself to not make excuses and push it all aside.  I also made the decision that I would stretch myself in my online presence more than ever before in becoming more vulnerable so you would learn more about me and who I am and know that you have a cheerleader who’s gone through crap and is here to encourage you to start and keep going.

You see, I had been scheduled for an outpatient surgery that would be completed within an hour. It was the second time in my life where I was going to be completely knocked out.  Needless to say, my nerves were stronger than I thought they would be.  I arrived earlier than the appointment, being that I was there before 5:30 am, and thank God for my mom who woke up extra early to go with me.  As I waited in the waiting room, the nerves began to grow stronger, but then my name was called and I was on my way.  All I could say to myself was “Let’s do this!”

Not too long after as I patiently waited to hear what happened, my doctor came in and told me “we have to do this again.”  He went on to tell me that my cervix decided, all on its own I might add, to twist itself so he was not able to do what he needed to.  At that moment I felt a huge sense of discouragement shower over me. It was like a big blanket that I wasn’t allowed to say no too.  I kept up the attitude it is what it is, but as the day moved forward, I found the discouragement going deeper and deeper without any chance of leaving. My mind would only focus on the time off work; paying for a surgery room, anesthesiologist and surgeon for something that never happened, and now having to go through it all again – double the cost and double the time.

This may sound silly, I know.  And then it all clicked!  I was forgetting one very important part of this story; and that is that God is in full control. I had let the discouragement begin to take over instead of looking to God and being thankful that there’s a do-over. For whatever reason, this last Monday was just not the day and it’s time to stop worrying, do what I need to and God will provide. If this is a season where I have to sacrifice a few things, then so be it.

It took some time, of course, for the anesthesia to wear off, but after it did, I found myself picking up the special book of life, allowing God to guide me on where he wanted me to go.  He took me straight to Philippians.  I was actually taken back how instantly I went to Philippians 4 and there it was . . . just as sure as the sun rises and the sun sets every single day:

Philippians 4:6, 9, 11, 13 and 19. I know this may seem like a lot, but the weird thing was is that each of these scriptures was highlighted from previous reads and each of them fit right along with where I was at that and together they made everything so clear:

4:6 – “Do not be anxious about anything . . . present your requests to God.”
4:9 – “Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in my – put it into practice.”
4:11 – “. . . be content whatever the circumstances.”
4:13 – “I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”
4:19 – “God will meet all hour needs . . .”

So, the moral of this story is that it never fails that when you forget to put your flesh to the curb and go to God, I believe you’ll always struggle more than you would have otherwise. I believe its God’s truth that gives us peace and comfort in knowing that it may not be easy but it will all work itself out.

Just have faith and believe over everything else and say “God is Good” and cast discouragement aside!